Art and randomness right…
I say in my own words at the top of this blog that art is about life. My art is supposed to reflect my life. This blog is supposed to reflect my art, which reflects my life. Yet, I always struggle with revealing my life through text. I have no problem doing it through my art. I feel the need to today though. For some reason, I feel the need.
This week has been one of the hardest weeks of 2009 for me. Most people who follow my work are aware of my medical condition. I do not hide IT. I have spoken about IT openly on TV, in magazine interviews and on my website. My parents hate that I am so open about IT, but for some reason, I feel it is important to be open about something that affects the lives of so many women around the world. IT is also a part of me and the reason I came to art. Art saved my life really, I might have been suicidal without art in my life to distract me from IT. But then, IT brought me back to Art, so I should really be grateful to IT too.
This week, my pain started on Tuesday. It got progressively worse and worse, until by Wednesday, I could barely walk. The pain was centered in my lower abdomen and spread all around my back, my “underneath” and down my legs. I can not remember the pain well enough to describe it properly, but it was so bad that I could not hold any food down. Every time I tried to eat a small amount so that I could take my pain killers, there was a stream of lumpy watery projectile vomit that I could not control. By evening, I was so weak and cold and shaky, I had to call my out of hours doctors service. Luckily, my partner was able to get there in time to drive me to the hospital. I was mercifully given two injections in my fleshy posterior. An anti sickeness injection and an intramuscular painkiller.
Within an hour or so, the edge was taken off the pain slightly, mercifully, and I was able to sleep the whole night through, well until 4 am when I had to wake up and take more pain killers and anti sickness tablets. Thank God, it is Friday now, and the pain killers have IT under control. I think I am through the worst of IT, and am back at my trusty baby lap top blogging and twittering away.
I wander what piece of art IT will inspire this time around?
That is my reason for going quiet for a few days any way. I just felt the need to vent about IT as this time, IT was BAD. IT is a part of me, IT brought me to art and IT inspires and informs my art always, so it is only fair that I aknowledge IT. My friend, my foe, my muse. Sounds like a lover.